How to Begin Implementing Nonviolent Communication
Nonviolent Communication (or NVC) is an approach to interpersonal harmony through a methodology of communication. Its goal is not to end disagreements. Its goal is to increase empathy and understanding between parties so that harmony can be reached. The methodology was developed by the clinical psychologist, Marshall Rosenberg in the 60s and 70s.
I was first introduced to NVC by a friend who linked me to a couple of Youtube videos in which Marshall Rosenberg explained NVC. I was struck by the power and truth of the methodology, which I will outline in this article.
We go about in life, and in communication, trying to be right. But when someone is right, then someone else must be wrong (in communication.) When someone is wrong, they deserve punishment or correction. But when it comes to emotions, how can someone be wrong? The problem doesn’t lay with emotions though, oh no. It lies with the blame game. NVC is all about eliminating blame and presenting observations and feelings as impartially as possible.
I’ll use an example. If I come home from work and there’s a pile of dishes in the sink, I might feel upset. The observation of dishes and the feeling of upset are impartial — they are facts. But if I go to my roommate and I say, hey that mess you made pisses me off, go clean it up — I’ve just entered into a…
